Last time I wrote about my job (Slussy) I was so agitated that I couldn’t fucking see straight. Beaten down by bills, bosses, benchmarks and bullshit. Completely reliant on a job that has zero loyalty and little appreciation. I was mentally whipping myself over falling face-first into the trap of 6-figure mortgage debt and wondering why anyone would choose this path.
A few nights ago, I was sitting in my living room and my wife told me that she’s having some car trouble. She called and made an appointment to get her vehicle into a mechanic. That was it. We didn’t think a single thing else about it. Last night I was at Target and bought a $20 water bottle and a $35 soccer goal for my son. Again, the $55 worth of impulse purchases didn’t mean a single thing to me. That’s when it started to hit me.
Do I have zero passion for the actual work that I am doing? Yes. Do I feel like my talents are underutilized and that the work I do is mostly underappreciated? Every day. But am I an ungrateful piece of 27-year-old shit who needs to take more time to appreciate how lucky I am to have a job and a house and the financial stability to provide for the people I love most on this earth? One hundred percent yes.
I think it can be easy to lose your grip on how insignificant your problems are in comparison to the rest of the world. Here I am, working a desk job to pay the mortgage and provide for my kids and wife, and taking it all for granted. There are people out there that would risk everything in the world to have the life that I live, and here I am bitching about not having a burning passion for the financial industry. Boo-fucking-hoo! It embarrasses me to think that I sometimes get so self-involved, but I think it happens to many of us.
My career isn’t my destination, it is my vessel. It is a tool that, should I use it correctly, will allow my son and daughter to go to any school that accepts them (IF they choose to pursue education after high-school). It allows me to grow my retirement at an early age. It allows me the financial freedom to vacation multiple times a year. It allowed me to build equity in a $200k home at 25 years old. It allowed me to buy the fucking laptop I am typing this from right now. Don’t let your career define who you are unless it’s who you REALLY are. Be grateful for the life you have and the opportunity you’ve been given.
My name is Colby G, and I am a devoted husband, a loving father, a supportive brother, a friend, a football fanatic, a lover of comedy, a craft-beer enthusiast, a creator, a writer, and an employee of a Midwestern Insurance and Financial Company.